On Relationships... with Computers!

It is interesting to hear my colleagues, non technical users of computers like me, comment on their average experience with their machines and the other computers that they have to interact with on a daily basis.

The reality is that, for many of us, our main work partner is a computer.  Yes, we interact with people when we teach and attend meetings.  However, when we are alone and must plan classes, prepare exams, write reports, or grade, the machine is there with us.


Most of my colleagues, obviously Windows users, seem to have engaged into a vicious usage pattern with their computers, one that, if it were a relationship, would be perceived as an abusive one: the user is "victimized" by the insensitive, demanding, and anger-prone machine.

For example, last November, since his Windows 7 computer had "walked out on him" (refused to work thanks to malware), a colleague "started a new relationship" with a machine with Windows 8.

Two days ago he wrote me complaining about the sourness of his "new relationship".

This is the same person that had told me that he hated Windows 8, but needed the computer so badly, that he could not wait. 

Ah, the nagging and the pain started soon for him.

Let us not blame the computer.  He had some problems with a Windows 7 machine before, so they "parted ways".  I took the machine to therapy (wiped out Windows and installed Linux) and now, with all her issues solved and having achieved internal peace, the machine is a great friend of mine and helps me happily. I enjoy working with it.

I do not even remember the last time I complained about the behavior of one of my computers... must have been when I was so fed up that I decided to go to counselling with Dr. Tux! :)

Well, while I have to admit that all my computers have now "dissociative identity disorder" because they all have multiple Linux personalities, each one of those identities is sweet, caring, tactful, and smart.

I started my ZaReason Strata with OpenMandriva today.  Instead of the dread that I experienced in my old days when dealing with Windows computers and I feared to see a virus warning or a blue screen, the machine literally started wishing me a happy 2015.

Cairo Dock new year greeting.  Wow, I was pleasantly surprised!

Ah, those little things... They do make a difference! ;)

TEST: How to know if your computer license should be revoked

In this world of ours, where cyber-crime has taken a rise, people should be given a test to determine if they are capable to use a computer. After all, if licenses are given to operate machinery and vehicles, or to prove that a person has undergone training on a certain area, why is it that individuals who have no idea about how to use a computer without risking a network have indiscriminate access to one?

Or even worse, why do those people who couldn't possibly care less about their own cyber-protection (or that of others) feel they have the right use a high-tech system they regard as some sort of an electric kettle and, in so doing, they compromise the safety of the Internet?

They should at least take a test with some easy questions to determine if it is less risky to have those people juggle with flame-throwers than it is having them turn on a computer. You know, like those tests that are published in magazines and newspapers to find out if you are cool, or if you are a nerd, or if one's habits indicate that one will eventually become a social menace.

Negligent computer users should take the test voluntarily in an attempt to assess their risk factor. The questions should be straight forward and, when in doubt, they should simply choose "yes".

I have collected some functional indicators from experiences with people around me:

Risk Level 1: Each affirmative answer = 1 pt.

1. You click on any link that you get by email as long as you recognize the name of the sender.

2. You plug in your USB drive and erase alerts without reading them because they bother you.

3. You can use your computer only because you wrote the steps to find your programs.

4. As soon as you see your computer acting funny, you call your techie friend to fix it for you.

5. Once the techie friend goes away, you generally blame him/her for all subsequent problems that your computer gives you.

Risk level 2: Each affirmative answer = 2 pts.

1. You keep forgetting to close your Facebook or email session.

2. You get an email reading "My girlfriend got your pictures and sent them to your spouse. You are dead meat. See pictures attached". So, you freak out and open the attachment, which happens to be a zip file where the compromising material is.

3. You strongly believe that there wouldn't exist any viruses online if everyone had the same antivirus and they kept it updated.

4. You open every powerpoint presentation that your relatives, friends, or colleagues send you, regardless of the fact that the powerpoint icon looks funny and the file is called "presentation.exe".

5. You download bundled software from the internet and install it to your Windows computer without even reading the different screens.

Risk level 3: Each affirmative answer = 3 pts.

1. You think that remembering passwords is too much trouble. Anyway, that's the job of the "computer people", not yours.

2. You never update the antivirus in your Windows computer because everyone else does. Anyway, that's also the job of the IT guys, not yours.

3. You strongly believe that your computer is OK as long as the system starts. All computers act funny, so it's not strange that yours also misbehaves from time to time.

4. You cannot run a specific program because a "moron" deleted the icon on the desktop.

5. You argue with people who do not support SOPA and PIPA, whom you call pirates. Then you go home and download a movie using this great Bitcomet thing that your teenage daughter/son installed to the home computer.

RESULTS:

From 1-5 points: You are like a drunk driver roaming cyber-roads. Your license should be suspended until you learn a bit about how not to be a danger for others and yourself online.

From 6-12 points: You might not know, but you became a legend. Yes, you are (in)famous because every computer you touch starts failing "mysteriously". Do the world a favor and stop using computers until you understand the risks. License suspended.

13-20 points: In your case, danger is like giving a four-year old a loaded Steyr TMP to play in the middle of a wedding reception. You HATE computers and it shows. Keep away from computers; they also HATE you. Only cyber-criminals love you. Your license to use computers should be revoked immediately.

21 points or more: I don't even know how to put it. You should seriously consider to lock yourself up in an anti-chip bubble, so that it will become difficult enough for you to interact with a computer in the future.

But you insist and want to use one of those wonderful machines? Then go get Linux ASAP. Only Linux can save us from you.

Different computer users, one common Linux complaint

There are several types of users in the world of computers. Most of them are simple, non-technical users; they are the kind of people who learned to use a computer without any formal training or they took some application courses (falsely called "computer courses"), so their understanding of a computer is simply too basic. These are naive users who tend to perceive the system as a magic box--sometimes the contemporary equivalent of Pandora's Box and, because of that, their learning is often thwarted by fear or anxiety ("I clicked here and the computer showed me a message box, so I panicked and turned if off").

Some other people belong to the opposite category: the power users. Their computer expertise makes them gurus and, therefore, the systems hold no secrets for them. My impression of these kind of people is that they speak binary code and can diagnose a computer problem rather effectively because they have more than one idea of what might have gone wrong.

There is a third group that frequently overlaps the two categories above. These people have developed skills to use several programs in a level that most computer users cannot, yet they lack the technical knowledge of power users. As a result of their expertise, they become sort of picky with their applications and the way in which their computer behaves. I call them gourmet users. This post here by Gene (ERACC) describes very well the difference between a power user and a gourmet user, whom he calls "niche user".

When the option to switch to Linux is presented, the nay-sayers of each group generally round up their reasons to something like this:

1. Simple users: (Without even trying it) "It's too difficult! It took me a lot of effort to learn to work with the computer and now I have to start it all over again?"

2. Gourmet users: "But if you cannot run ______________ (insert name of their favorite application), this is not good".

3. Power users: "Mmm. The thing is that I prefer to work with _______"(insert name of MS programming tool).

The basic issue underlying those claims is recalcitrance. Yes, those individuals are not willing to lean to work in a different way. Regardless of the arguments, unwillingness to learn is normally the bottom line, which is sad, because very rarely is it that learning something new hurts you.

I guess I fall in the gourmet user category. I decided not to jump into the MS Office 2007 wagon because I could use the previous version quite efficiently. Well, since the version I bought did not include PowerPoint, I had to learn how to use electronic presentation software in StarOffice. Additionally, I didn't like the Ribbon interface...and they killed "Linxs". To modify pictures, I used Satori (never liked Photoshop), not MS Paint. And I didn't use MS Movie Maker to produce videos, but VirtualDub. I required my OS to be able to handle Japanese input. Finally, I also wanted my OS to handle text-to-speech synthesis, to fire all sorts of alarms (music, alerts, actions) and to keep me protected from malware. I managed to learn how to do all that in Windows (with the obvious exception of the latter, which is virtually impossible). To do everything I required, the computer depended on many, many third-party programs to add functionality to the MS OS.

I never shy away from learning. That's the reason why migrating to Linux was not so difficult for me...not to mention that I found a friendlier environment in which all tasks I require from the OS can be performed more easily than in the MS operating system.